Welcome to the Wizard101 Message Boards


Player Guide
Fansites
News
Game Updates
Help

By posting on the Wizard101 Message Boards you agree to the Code of Conduct.

Good Manners Matter

AuthorMessage
Champion
May 03, 2011
447
I imagine this topic has been dealt with before, but I guess it's worth repeating. First, I find lots of people in the Spiral to be well-mannered and nice when asking for help, and grateful when you give or offer it. But there are some--and these are text chat, not menu chat people, so they have no real excuse--who simply write this when they need help: "teleport to me." The subtext I hear is "you are my servant, now come give me help immediately." I can't tell you how annoying this is. So I write back, "would you like some help?" Answer: "yeah." With this kind of approach they're lucky anyone will help them at all. I try to gently remind them to ask nicely, but short of just saying they're rude, I can't think of a good way to nudge them back into the realm of good game manners. So if it happens three times, they're off my list.

Sigh. Just venting, I guess.

Hero
Aug 23, 2009
723
I whole heartedly agree, but you are much nicer than I am, I only give one warning then boot them away. Those who get booted tend to start whining and begging because they realize they have just lost one of the few people willing to help them due to their poor and arrogant attitudes. Not only does it free up my friend list, but helps to only keep real and respectful friends and battle comrades.

Adherent
Mar 12, 2010
2779
Oh my. You are more kind than I would be.

Just yesterday, I was in Grizzleheim, near Skellek, and someone passing by asked me to be his friend. I said "yes", and a few seconds later, he sent me a text message (not menu chat), to "teleport to him".

Since I wasn't in any big hurry and had some time, I did teleport to him. He was fighting Skellek. Again, I didn't mind helping him and we won.

As soon as the fight ended, he left. I waited a few minutes to see what would happen. "Nothing". No "bye", no "thank you". Nothing.

So I deleted him from my friends list.

As I said, you are more kind than I would be.


Illuminator
Feb 09, 2009
1473
Yes, I know how frustrating that is, but that's what you have to deal with when playing an MMORPG. It shouldn't be the case, but it is. Anyway, you shouldn't get hung up on how rude some players are when there are millions of other players in the Spiral.

Mastermind
May 13, 2011
381
i am much kinder than you are. i have a friend who always asks for help and i go to her, even though its a normal battle. i give her warning but i dont remove them. in fact, i always accept friend requests and never delete them. i guess im just too nice

Historian
Jan 05, 2011
660
I am a very friendly, light hearted person until someone is discourteous to me. one time i had just signed in and received a text chat message 'port to me'. they received back: 'in the future, i hope you're more polite to the people you ask for help.' then i deleted them, signed off, and signed back on. also, anyone who ports to me without asking either gets deleted immediately or receives this message: 'if you port to me again without asking, i will delete you from my friend list'. i may seem delete happy, but all it takes is a little courtesy to maintain a friendship with me. and it's not just low levels or new people, i've deleted legendaries who ported out of nowhere when i was only a master and grandmaster. courtesy is for all to follow! -elijah darkthorn, legendary conjurer (and crew)

Champion
May 03, 2011
447
I guess it depends on how you feel about it after, just like in real life. I mean, if it doesn't bother you, then of course you shouldn't delete anyone. But I am kind of sensitive about respect and manners--I think society works best when people agree to treat each other respectfully and politely. I don't think a game should be any different. Some people think it's okay to be meaner, ruder, and all around nastier when they are hiding behind an avatar or an alias. Probably a lot of them are better behaved in real life (I hope!). But I guess my feeling is that, by deleting them, I am sending them a message--it's not okay to treat people like that. Today, for example, I had someone ask for help in a higher realm than I have access to. I came, and faced two rank 7 guys. And she fled! No explanation, nothing. I didn't know if it was some kind of mean game or what, so I deleted her. But to each his/her own, I guess. I try to strike some middle ground.

Survivor
Jan 30, 2011
26
I don't take any of the W101 stuff too seriously. Texting causes all of us to shortcut our speech, especially in the heat of battle. My experience has been that the thank you's and your welcome's during a battle fly fast and furious making me feel like I'm in a Chip 'n Dale cartoon. :D As for permission to port, I don't expect it and I don't ask it, however, I do my best not to port unasked into a dungeon. If you port and join a battle, all I ask is that you stay and help out the best you can, and I'll do the same. If you use my traps, oh well, life goes on.

Survivor
Jan 17, 2011
12
For me, I have only been playing for maybe 6 months. the biggest manners thing that royally honks me off is people asking for stuff out of the blue that costs crowns. It seems rude to me. Seriously rude. The "help!" and "Help! port to me!" things don't bother me too much (but for reference I will remember to ask before I port to someone now. I hadn't realized it might be considered rude.), But the begging someone to buy you stuff when you are just hit and miss friends, really bugs the snot out of me.

Historian
Jan 05, 2011
660
magikcat wrote:
For me, I have only been playing for maybe 6 months. the biggest manners thing that royally honks me off is people asking for stuff out of the blue that costs crowns. It seems rude to me. Seriously rude. The "help!" and "Help! port to me!" things don't bother me too much (but for reference I will remember to ask before I port to someone now. I hadn't realized it might be considered rude.), But the begging someone to buy you stuff when you are just hit and miss friends, really bugs the snot out of me.
i think it's the context of the request. if someone says 'help!' or 'help! port to me!' it's fine and not sounding commanding. it's when someone just says 'port to me' or just 'port' and they have never talked me before, it comes off as like a command instead of a request. All it would take is a 'hello' and perhaps a 'please' in there somewhere and it wouldn't bother me. but i definitely agree with the people you don't know asking for gifts being extremely rude. that's instant deletion from my list right there for me, no explanation required. -eli and crew

Champion
May 03, 2011
447
Yes, I am totally fine with people sending "help!" messages. They don't have to be uber-polite if they are in a battle--but the "help" is crucial. I don't respond to imperious "port" commands. I don't even know what they want then--sometimes people write this if they're having a party or something. I like to know what I'm porting to, after all. Re: gift requests--yeah, I don't get that. I'd be embarrassed to ask some (almost-) stranger to buy me stuff. It's weird.

Defender
Oct 09, 2010
160
The "port to me" thing doesn't bother me too much, if they say "port to me right now", obviously I'll be deleting them, but if you need help, show it. Say my friend needs help with a super hard boss. They better not drag me in the battle and just flee. Complete waste of time. Especially when I'm busy. Unless you have a good reason, for sure I won't be helping the rude friend anytime soon!

Astrologist
Aug 13, 2009
1088
tabby714 wrote:
I imagine this topic has been dealt with before, but I guess it's worth repeating. First, I find lots of people in the Spiral to be well-mannered and nice when asking for help, and grateful when you give or offer it. But there are some--and these are text chat, not menu chat people, so they have no real excuse--who simply write this when they need help: "teleport to me." The subtext I hear is "you are my servant, now come give me help immediately." I can't tell you how annoying this is. So I write back, "would you like some help?" Answer: "yeah." With this kind of approach they're lucky anyone will help them at all. I try to gently remind them to ask nicely, but short of just saying they're rude, I can't think of a good way to nudge them back into the realm of good game manners. So if it happens three times, they're off my list.

Sigh. Just venting, I guess.


I hate when people constantly ask for help. I'm a Life wizard, and everyone's smothering me for help. I try to stay hidden... I know what you mean. Exactly-what you mean.