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To Malistaire

AuthorMessage
Survivor
May 31, 2011
1
Ok one reason is because he has a lot of health.I do agree with you in some ways because he used storm snake!But he has people to help him.They are low health but high attack.so really not that weak. danial level 59

Explorer
Jan 14, 2011
78
Dear Malistaire,
I'm really looking forward to battling you! I just got to Dragonspyre today, and I am already prepairing to wipe the floor with you! :D :D :D
Your brother is really starting to creep me out... Since when did he give a flying fishtail about me? Last time I got a spell from him, he told me to go play in the street somewhere, and now he is treating me like some sort of hero.
I'll tell you what, once I get to battle you at last, can we make it a friendly match? I can make muffins and stuff, I'm sure you'll like them. Maybe you can go a little bit easy on me and my friend, just like you did these people on the forum? That would be great.

Thank you!
Haley Fairygarden Level 43 Life Wizard

P.S. I'm serious about the muffins. Do you want blueberry, or chocolate chip? I also make a mean lemon poppy seed muffin!

Archon
Feb 07, 2011
3175
MistressHogwarts wrote:
Dear Malistaire,

Hiya! How's taking over the world? Is Mr. Fluffy the dragon titan lord doing okay? Ok, good good. Well, first of all, I want you to apologize to vonawesome1 for making her wait to get her Lvl 50 Balance gear.


I'd be happy with that. Of course, I'd be happier if he gave me the throne... and maybe a cookie. But asking for a cookie is probably pushing it.

MistressHogwarts wrote:
Second, I want you to apologize to QueQueg and not giving her the Balance gear she wants, and to make up for it, hand over the Balance gear.


Uh, yeah. There's no good reason not to fork it over... No one should have to visit you a thousand times, Mr. Drake~ you're mean, cowardly, and kinda emo... and those are your good points.

MistressHogwarts wrote:
Thirdly, I want you to apologize for the injustice you caused me by making me put 50 crowns in your treasure box thingamabob to get my Myth gear while giving me the unneeded Balance gear for free. But thanks for the Myth gear .


You know, Malistaire, I get that scheming is a great past-time.... Hey, I do it all the time! But picking on innocent students for fun and profit? Even by my non-existent standards, that's pretty despicable! In fact, I'm playing Sims Medieval right now, and won't hesitate to to shove your Sim-self into the (very aptly-named) Pit of Judgement.

But, to be fair, at least you gave her the gear before level 76.

*cough*

MistressHogwarts wrote:
Ok, most importantly, I think you should get eye drops for Mr. Fluffy's eye. It keeps blinking and I think something's in it. Oh, and as a side note, your wife is too easy! The next time you bring someone back to life, make them more powerful. Ok? Ok. :D Well, thanks!


I promise I'll bring Mr. Fluffy some eye-drops next time I visit. As for Sylvia, I left a plate of tasty cookies in her crypt... Don't think she'll be bothering us anymore. :)

MistressHogwarts wrote:
P.P.P.S. You should let vonawesome1 take over, her evil plans sound a lot better than yours and I think she'll make a better villain than you. Just sayin'! :D


Booyah! May as well just surrender now, Malistaire... NO ONE out-evils the great vonAwesome! Not even you...

You, Sabrina, just made my day! When I take over Dragonspyre, you can keep Mr. Fluffy as a pet... be sure to keep him fed, and don't put any more weird stuff in his eyes. Deal?

Infinite cookies and doom...
*cough* I mean, HUGS, to all!

El Veeb,
Archmage of Awesomeness.

Survivor
Feb 28, 2009
45
vonawesome1 wrote:
MistressHogwarts wrote:
Dear Malistaire,

Hiya! How's taking over the world? Is Mr. Fluffy the dragon titan lord doing okay? Ok, good good. Well, first of all, I want you to apologize to vonawesome1 for making her wait to get her Lvl 50 Balance gear.


I'd be happy with that. Of course, I'd be happier if he gave me the throne... and maybe a cookie. But asking for a cookie is probably pushing it.

MistressHogwarts wrote:
Second, I want you to apologize to QueQueg and not giving her the Balance gear she wants, and to make up for it, hand over the Balance gear.


Uh, yeah. There's no good reason not to fork it over... No one should have to visit you a thousand times, Mr. Drake~ you're mean, cowardly, and kinda emo... and those are your good points.

MistressHogwarts wrote:
Thirdly, I want you to apologize for the injustice you caused me by making me put 50 crowns in your treasure box thingamabob to get my Myth gear while giving me the unneeded Balance gear for free. But thanks for the Myth gear .


You know, Malistaire, I get that scheming is a great past-time.... Hey, I do it all the time! But picking on innocent students for fun and profit? Even by my non-existent standards, that's pretty despicable! In fact, I'm playing Sims Medieval right now, and won't hesitate to to shove your Sim-self into the (very aptly-named) Pit of Judgement.

But, to be fair, at least you gave her the gear before level 76.

*cough*

MistressHogwarts wrote:
Ok, most importantly, I think you should get eye drops for Mr. Fluffy's eye. It keeps blinking and I think something's in it. Oh, and as a side note, your wife is too easy! The next time you bring someone back to life, make them more powerful. Ok? Ok. :D Well, thanks!


I promise I'll bring Mr. Fluffy some eye-drops next time I visit. As for Sylvia, I left a plate of tasty cookies in her crypt... Don't think she'll be bothering us anymore. :)

MistressHogwarts wrote:
P.P.P.S. You should let vonawesome1 take over, her evil plans sound a lot better than yours and I think she'll make a better villain than you. Just sayin'! :D


Booyah! May as well just surrender now, Malistaire... NO ONE out-evils the great vonAwesome! Not even you...

You, Sabrina, just made my day! When I take over Dragonspyre, you can keep Mr. Fluffy as a pet... be sure to keep him fed, and don't put any more weird stuff in his eyes. Deal?

Infinite cookies and doom...
*cough* I mean, HUGS, to all!

El Veeb,
Archmage of Awesomeness.


Dear vonawesome1,

Thank you for giving Sylvia her cookies , I'm sure she'll love them. And as for the eye drops, I won't be visiting Malistaire again until I get there (which is in a little while) so I appreciate you giving Mr. Fluffy the eye drops. And, yes it's definitely a deal; Mr. Fluffy would make an adorable pet :D, and, as a bonus, I can use him as a bargaining tool, you know, when things don't go my way . Anyway, yeah, see you in the Spiral maybe!

Sincerely,

A Very Excited Girl Who Absolutely Cannot Wait to Get Mr. Fluffy,

Sabrina Goldendust
Lvl 46 Conjurer

P.S. Can I have some infinite cookies too? :D

P.P.S Don't worry, I'll keep Mr. Fluffy fed with all those people that you don't like, vonawesome1 muahahaha

Illuminator
Oct 22, 2011
1304
MistressHogwarts writes: Second, I want you to apologize to QueQueg and not giving her the Balance gear she wants, and to make up for it, hand over the Balance gear.

Dear Malistaire:

You need to listen to MistressHogwarts. I want my Balance gear. As soon as I'm finished writing this letter to you, I'm gonna visit your lair and take what's mine. Yes, mine. I earned it. I deserve it. Plus, you need to give me a hefty apology for holding back on me. *sniffle* Okay, I'm not going to cry. Really .... *sniffle*. I just want what everyone else has. Is that too much to ask?

I'm cooking a Couch Potato Pie, and I'll be bringing some Ham & Fickle Pickle sandwiches. Will that soften you up?

Rowan Dragonstrider
Archmage Sorceress Extraordinaire

Archon
Feb 07, 2011
3175
MistressHogwarts wrote:
Dear vonawesome1,


Oh, please~ call me El Veeb. Your Evilness works, too. ;)

MistressHogwarts wrote:
Thank you for giving Sylvia her cookies , I'm sure she'll love them. And as for the eye drops, I won't be visiting Malistaire again until I get there (which is in a little while) so I appreciate you giving Mr. Fluffy the eye drops. And, yes it's definitely a deal; Mr. Fluffy would make an adorable pet :D, and, as a bonus, I can use him as a bargaining tool, you know, when things don't go my way . Anyway, yeah, see you in the Spiral maybe!
Sincerely,

A Very Excited Girl Who Absolutely Cannot Wait to Get Mr. Fluffy,

Sabrina Goldendust
Lvl 46 Conjurer


You're very welcome~ glad I could... uh, help? And I hope you enjoy Mr. Fluffy; taking care of him is a lot of work, when I've got an overlord to overthrow and someone to blame for it...

MistressHogwarts wrote:
P.S. Can I have some infinite cookies too? :D


You betcha! But you can't share them with Sylvia... she's got her own.

MistressHogwarts wrote:
P.P.S Don't worry, I'll keep Mr. Fluffy fed with all those people that you don't like, vonawesome1 muahahaha


You know what? With each post, I find myself liking you more and more... In fact, you can feed those people to my carnivorous bunnies, too~ and maybe QueQueg's pet ducks, assuming that she's okay with it. If she isn't, well... too bad, because I'm evil and that's the way the cookie crumbles!

- El Veeb
Archmage of Awesomeness

-

Dear Malistaire,

In case it wasn't obvious, this is the first part of your training.

SuperVillainy101:

1. I'm evil, and really enjoy slamming people like you with Power Novas. Everything I say after this is final.

2. Real villains don't use faerie dust... and they don't sparkle. Ever.

3. Always bribe your minions with things like cookies, and cute/fluffy animals. And don't call them minions... to their faces. *smirk*

4. Always ask yourself, "what would vonAwesome do?". If the answer involves cookies or kittens, you're probably on the right track.

BUT

5. When in doubt, ALWAYS refer to rule #1.

Namaste, Grasshopper!

El Veeb,
Archmage of Awesomeness and Empress of Evil

Survivor
Feb 02, 2011
7
I think malistaire should be a bit harder because when i was helping a friend he just used dark sprite and the screamer

Explorer
Mar 14, 2009
71
Dear Foolish Wizards,

Do you believe I am not strong? I am the all-mighty dark lord of the Spiral! Need I remind you you chased me down the whole Spiral? Was the whole world of Dragonspyre easy? Was Marleybone easy? What about the countless times your perished under the hands of my minions walking 'round the world?

Do not underestimate me. I have all the power in the Spiral. Who else can awaken a Dragon Titan without being brutally beaten or eaten?

Anyway, I've got to get back to fighting these young Wizards. Man, every day they stampede down my door, beat up all my little Draconian buddies, and crush my dreams. :(

By being the supreme lord of all darkness and evil, I presume break time is seldom.

-Your Worst Nightmare,

Malistare.

Archon
Feb 07, 2011
3175
spongy458 wrote:
Dear Foolish Wizards,

Do you believe I am not strong? I am the all-mighty dark lord of the Spiral! Need I remind you you chased me down the whole Spiral? Was the whole world of Dragonspyre easy? Was Marleybone easy? What about the countless times your perished under the hands of my minions walking 'round the world?

Do not underestimate me. I have all the power in the Spiral. Who else can awaken a Dragon Titan without being brutally beaten or eaten?

Anyway, I've got to get back to fighting these young Wizards. Man, every day they stampede down my door, beat up all my little Draconian buddies, and crush my dreams. :(

By being the supreme lord of all darkness and evil, I presume break time is seldom.

-Your Worst Nightmare,

Malistare.


Dear Spongy/Malistaire impersonator #1545684848,

The answers to your questions~ yes, yes, no, heck no, and ROFL... in that order. In fact, Shadowsong (the Archmage of Awesomeness), Sestiva, and Val are smirking in your general direction as we speak...

To be honest, I feel kinda sorry for you... all of those wizards just barging in and thinking they can walk in and take whatever they want, whenever they feel like it.... Oh, the indignity! But it's all self-inflicted.

Here's a suggestion:

Grow a backbone, and stop letting those darn kids walk all over you. That's a cardinal rule of super-villainy... if they think you're weak, or afraid of them, they will eat you alive! If they want a fight, GIVE THEM ONE... then, crush their dreams and laugh (but we won't talk about that part~ it's less fun when they expect it).

As for Sylvia... well, too bad. I'm sorry, but there's nothing anyone can do about that, except find you the number of a really-good shrink. Mine is a guy named Dr. Acula~ he always brings me cookies and a bunny for me to cuddle with... I think you'll like him. But, if he offers you fruit punch, always say no.

I'm convinced that your mother didn't hug you enough, and it explains a lot (like why you and Cyrus are both so grumpy all the time). Hugs are free, and kinda awesome~ next time I drop in, remind me to give you one before we duke it out.

Infinite hugs, fluff, and LOVE!

El Veeb,
the Empress of Evil

Explorer
Jan 14, 2011
78
Dear Malistaire,

I'm baaack! I finally found you! I got to your silly dungeon, got in, got out, no problem. I even left with a stone rose, thanks to a high level buddy. Fighting you was not what I expected. AT ALL. I believe the strongest spell you used was a banshee. A banshee. Are you kidding me? That is, like, a rank two spell. Are you a schnitzel or a man?! (lol, phineas and ferb reference)
I know I promised you muffins, but you were not worth my muffins! I shall give them to vonawesome instead.
And yeah, Mr. Fluffy does need some eye drops. Maybe his contact lenses are bothering him?

So anyways,
Peace, love, and rainbow pegasi
Haley Fairygarden

"If you are walking on thin ice, you might as well dance"


Archon
Feb 07, 2011
3175
akitahbird wrote:
Dear Malistaire,

I'm baaack! I finally found you! I got to your silly dungeon, got in, got out, no problem. I even left with a stone rose, thanks to a high level buddy. Fighting you was not what I expected. AT ALL. I believe the strongest spell you used was a banshee. A banshee. Are you kidding me? That is, like, a rank two spell. Are you a schnitzel or a man?! (lol, phineas and ferb reference)
I know I promised you muffins, but you were not worth my muffins! I shall give them to vonawesome instead.
And yeah, Mr. Fluffy does need some eye drops. Maybe his contact lenses are bothering him?

So anyways,
Peace, love, and rainbow pegasi
Haley Fairygarden

"If you are walking on thin ice, you might as well dance"



Dear Haley,

You rock! And thanks for the muffins... I'm sure they'll be tasty. :)

Dear Malistaire,

She's right~ you're not worth our muffins. For a moment, I considered being nice and sharing them with you... but, like a true villain, I don't bend under pressure. So, your sad-puppy eyes won't work on me... Darkness, despair!

Tell you what~ I'm going to host a tea-party in your lair and share my newly-acquired muffins with everyone on this thread (including Mr. Fluffy and Sylvia), except you; when you man up, you can join us.

*munch*

-El Veeb
the Muffin Queen

Survivor
Feb 23, 2009
3
Dear Malistare,

Why do you have to be so weak my fellow ice wizard and i were only level 45 when we kicked your butt. Sure you may have ten thousand health but it only took us two hits to kill you and your minions. Even as a person from the death school it only took me one hit to get you down to less than 5,000 health. And all you used against the ice wizard and i was vampire. Vampire! I mean is that the best you. You are giving other wizards scarecrow and skeletal pirate i mean come on you are supposed to be the second to last boss shouldn't you be harder for a level 45. And next time use your mustache as a weapon then maybe you can win.

Peace out mr.mustache

Survivor
Mar 20, 2012
5
I'm a level 17 so I know nothing about Malistare but he seems weak im in Krokotopia right now it's hard. If Malistare is hard I would feel like a fool

Dear ,
Malistare
I feel Bad for you because of you losing your wife. But you don't have to be a villian over it things happen and you better serrender because WE ARE TAKING YOU DOWN!!!!!!! :P

Survivor
Feb 23, 2009
3
ILOVEHARRYPOTTER77... wrote:
I'm a level 17 so I know nothing about Malistare but he seems weak im in Krokotopia right now it's hard. If Malistare is hard I would feel like a fool

Dear ,
Malistare
I feel Bad for you because of you losing your wife. But you don't have to be a villian over it things happen and you better serrender because WE ARE TAKING YOU DOWN!!!!!!! :P


Dear ILOVEHARRYPOTTER77

If you are level 17 and know nothing about malistare then how do you know that his wife is dead. And by the way you slpet surrendhr wrong and also...

Dear Malistare,

My ice wizard friend and i have fought you with in 2 days and that is all we have done while we have been on and each time it is quicker and quicker today took five or ten minutes. And that whole time all you have used againstus was a dark fairy. I mean you really need to use your mustache you would surely win then.

Peace out Mr. Italian Mustache

Survivor
May 09, 2012
1
kingamebass wrote:
Dear Malistaire,

Why are you so weak? Yes, you do have 10,000 health, but that's not the point. The point is that you cast very weak spells. The strongest spell you cast is either a Kraken or a Scarecrow. That's so weak! We all know that you can either be more challenging or you can just kick yourself out of the Spiral. Is this what we get for a final boss? Well, you used to be a final boss. Even the Waterworks boss, Sylvester Glowstorm is stronger than you! You know better.

Sincerely,

Mason Deathwalker
Level 45 Master Diviner

Squire
Feb 29, 2012
502
Dear Malistaire,

Do you hold something against Diviners or am I just being typical whiny me? You gave me Skeletal Pirates and only ONE health steal. I expected better from the 'Master of Death.' Seriously, use the seven pip spell. The Ice gal with me could have survived.

And don't get mad at me because I knocked out your servants in one go. If they fuel your magic, then I can see why I only got five pip spells. x cough cough x "Weak" x cough cough x

You alone were far easier to face then I expected. Granted, I'm still mad that you knocked me out all of once, but that's manageable. And my only other peeve is that you never once ever aimed at the gal I brought in with me. I may have high health, but I am not your punching bag.

- Scarlet Nightdreamer, Grandmaster Diviner

P.S. Beware of the rising Pyromancer, Necromancer and Thaumaturge

Survivor
May 21, 2012
13
You guys crack me up. I sincerely hope we meet up in game. It would be a blast! Thanks for making a fun game even more fun!

Archon
Feb 07, 2011
3175
bnds02 wrote:
You guys crack me up. I sincerely hope we meet up in game. It would be a blast! Thanks for making a fun game even more fun!


Dear bnds02,

We're glad you had a chuckle~ I have a blast reading these letters, and I love writing them, too. ;) If you have a Central account, I'd be happy to meet up with you in-game!

You're kraken me up! :P

-

Dear Malistaire,

Your ruined painting looks great on my wall, thanks. But I still see a problem~ as of now, my good friend Rowan still doesn't have her Balance gear; like, what's the deal? Do we have to beat it out of you?

My little Tavia is coming to visit you soon... She's a nice girl, who doubles as a very-angry Life wizard; to say the least, she'll at least offer you cookies before knocking you out (more than can be said for Shadowsong, who thought it'd be more fun to dispense with formalities and just clock you right in the schnoz).

By the way, your nose is long and your mom dresses you funny.

*smirk*

-El Veeb
the Empress of Evil

-

Dear Sylvia,

I don't know how you put up with him, nor do I want to. Sure, the whole mess is indirectly your fault, but... d'you think you could bottle your secrets for dealing with wannabe villains? I'll even give you a cookie...

The short version: your husband is off his rocker! My condolences.

Love and candy-canes,
"El Veeb"

Survivor
May 21, 2012
13
I do have a central account. I am two quests away from my first meeting with Malistaire. Should meet him tonight. Wish me luck.

Steven Spellcaster
Level 51 Diviner

Squire
Feb 29, 2012
502
Dear Malistaire,

Would it be too much just to drop some gear that I can actually use? Please? I'm getting a little annoyed with having to run through your dungeon, then fight you just to get some other school's gear.

And just as a side note, my Ice wizard with kick you back to Wizard City. I'm just saying.

Back on track. I can't go in there much more with friends, since they're all in Celestia and concentrating on those quests. Please, drop my gear. I'll bake you some cookies if you do.

Peace, love. and pancakes.
Scarlet Nightdreamer, Grandmaster Diviner

Survivor
May 21, 2012
13
Survivor
Jun 07, 2009
3
Archon
Feb 07, 2011
3175
Hey there, bnds02~

Congratulations! You've made it this far, but the true challenge lies in getting him to drop your gear before you're level 76 (by which point it's useless, but I just wanted the bragging rights of saying I'd eventually gotten it)... Plus, who doesn't want to wear something called a Tunic of Torment? I mean, how hard-core is that? LOL.

(PS: Was that you who added me on Central?)

Good luck!
-El Veeb

-

Dear Malistaire,

If I promise not to be mean/call you names/wear pink this time, will you PLEASE just give Rowan her Balance gear? I mean, I get that you enjoy our company, but... we're both level 80 now! This is beyond the point of insanity, so give it up and go find someone else to torment~ seriously, we're sick to death of groveling (bad pun intended, tee hee).

(Worth noting: you gave *me* the gear AND the painting again the other night, when I showed up by myself... Rowan is going to hate me now. Thanks a lot! But we're not going to give up that easily... or maybe we will, since you're being ridiculous.)

No love,

El Veeb,
the Empress of Evil.

Illuminator
Oct 22, 2011
1304
Dear Malistaire:

Vonawesome and I have been coming to you two or three times in a row (in one day), every day for a while now. And STILL, you have not given me my Balance gear. What's up with that? I now have multiple gear for every other wizard I have, but you refuse to grant me this one request?

We have grovelled. We have made snide remarks. We brought cookies and Scooby snacks. We changed the colors of our gear (no more day-glo pink for vonawesome). I ate tons of greenery and passed enough 'gas' to knock out an entire army and clear the Spiral. And yet, I still can't get my Balance gear.

What else should I do? What will appease you (except us losing)?

Rowan DragonStrider
Archmage of Disappointment (because of you)

Archon
Feb 07, 2011
3175
Dear Malistaire,

We get that you're lonely and miserable, that your minions are dim and can't hold a conversation to save their lives... or unlives. But, for the love of all things sacred, I think you need to let us go.

We've paid several visits to your lair over the past few weeks, and it's always the same: we win, and you cry to KI staff about how mean we are, after which they withhold the gear and pretend to feel sorry for you. But we all know the truth~ the reason they're holding out on us is because, once we get the gear, we won't come back to visit... and we won't be around to amuse them, as I'm sure we do. Clearly, you and KI both need to find a new source of entertainment.

QueQueg and I are both archmages. We should not /have/ to grovel to you~ especially not when we have surpassed you in both power and awesomeness. It would appear that you're a glutton for punishment, since you always come back to us, even when we make snide remarks/call you names/wear pink... We've purposely steered clear of insulting Sylvia... but, if that's what it takes to get the gear, then so be it.

Still no love,
El Veeb